Porque te pienso te quiero en la distancia,

sin importar rastro alguno que hayas dejado en mi.

Al saber que como yo sufriras a diario,

"La soledad de dos amantes que al dejarse

estan luchando cada quien por no encontrarse".

Del amor ni se hable: No he dejado de quererte ni un solo dia.

El pensarte me exacerba del dolor.

Puedes jurar que al que quiere lo bendigo.

Y como dice Bunbury, aunque paresca que te lo escribi yo:

" Quiero que seas feliz, Aunque no sea conmigo"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYZiHcevpxM

Te extranno y te vivo a dia a dia.

I made a mistake: "Here I go to fall apart so long

when we'll meet again I will not be there..."
Te acuerdas? Cantando en el estudio, en donde entonabas tus mejores melodias.

"If you come a long this time

I show you the things that were mine

I am bleeding from the walls that cry

oh life has past me by..."

When we meet again I won't be there.

Aun asi sigues lejos,

apartado de mis brazos que calor te brindaron.

De aquel carinno insaciable que te llenaba de vida,

De amor y ternura, reflejados en tu existencia.

Una vez mas, Perdon.

No me canso de clamarte un perdon, de alguna manera irracional

Un perdon inoportuno y cobarde.

El perdon que jamas supe pedir.

Te extranno desde mis entrannas

Mi vida no es la misma sin ti,

aunque no podria ser lo que he alcanzado sino hubiese sido por ti.

El perdon es en nombre de la entrannable fe que hubo en ti.

Aunque me siga mi camino hacia la nada,

esperando un bienestar seguro

no puedo despedirme sin hacer un tributo a vos.

Por haber creido en mi hasta el final

y por seguir haciendolo hasta el sol de hoy.

Gracias.

Te quiero con la fuerza que me da la vida misma.

Al no definir mis sentimientos hacia ti

siento haber perdido lo que me hace falta para recuperar mi humanidad.

Tan intangible; tan irreal

Si pudiera definirte con mis palabras

seria maldecir tu existencia.

Retrasar tu memoria es inalcanzable

En la utopia de mi mente vivo entrecortada por tu ser.

Existiendo en retrospectiva para ser lo que mas deseaste al contemplar un atardecer.

Arrojando piedras en el lago,

liberandote de la rutina misma

mirando hacia el horizonte en busca de un futuro anhelado

a causa de un pasado que siempre te marco.

Contemplando la vaga imagen de tu rostro en mi frente, 

vigilo tu mirada hacia tu futuro.

Atrapo tu pensamiento por un instante,

sin saber el futuro que me espera.

Ese sufrimiento que se alimenta de tu recuerdo.

Suenno con algun dia poder intoxicar ese sufrimiento

para que me abandone de una vez por todas!

Pero aun asi anhelo seguir llevandote en el recuerdo de esos besos

Evocarte en las tardes de febrero, en medio de la nieve.

Recordandote en las noches de junio al  caminar en la madrugada.

El sentarme en el parque a fumar  el humo que alguna vez compartimos.

Tus ojos anhelando un cambio que desafortunadamente no te pude dar..

El coraje que con tanta urgencia buscabas, no te lo logre brindar.

Y robarte una sonrisa al darte una mirada de amor...

Ay, mi muchacho de los ojos tristes -por que no estas aqui?

Para llenarte de alegria tus vacios insaciables.

Espero estes bien, and still my guitar gently weeps. 

PS: As much as I wish I could have finished your song, I failed miserably. I gave it my best shot, but couldn't really synthesize all the feelings I have about you. It's a collage of many different sensations, and yet I am not sure what it is.

I miss you miserably; in the hopes that the grass is greener on the other side.

And even if my human side attempts to knock on material doors,

My heart still remains true to the one and only You.

All is quiet on New Year's Day MMXI

"May the New Year bring you whatever is it that you are contemplating from the bottom of your heart, be it: loosing weight, eating healthier, buying a new car, falling in love, or simply getting by."

-Dre-

I am sure up to start the New Year with my right foot complying to one of the resolutions from my list, which includes actually writing more. I find this quite therapeutic, particularly when I have no reason to rant but yet my head still feels like a HUGE Scrabble bag.  I find this sudden intrinsic drive to spontaneously come up with  resolutions for the NY to be quite amusing. Surprisingly enough, the people around me do not show much interest in doing so. It's funny because I had my mind set on writing mine for quite a while, but for some odd reason I could not get myself to sit down and get it over with, until last night at around 21:00. I came up with 30  bullets of rather realistic goals; nothing too idealistic that I wouldn't be able to achieve. We'll see how all these goals turn out throughout the year.

One thing is certain: 2011 upholds a great deal of important decisions for me to make. If everything goes according to plan I will be finishing my career and joining the work force (finally, the real side of life); something I have been contemplating for a while. Let's face it: Being a student can be quite the bundle of joy but Mensch if you have to stretch yourself in unbelievable manners (physically, emotionally, economically, chronologically, gastronomically, among others). Yes, joining the work force also comes with its disadvantages, such as having to pay taxes (it isn't too bad after all, we get free health care ^.^), having to pay back student loans with HIGH interest fees, various other miscellaneous bills, and let's not forget that if you have a significant other things obviously change, depending on your degree of involvement. For me it isn't too bad right now as my idea of family is not listed in the near future (nor in the far future for that matter), so my entire focus will be on miscellaneous little issues. 

I am aiming that MMXI will be my last year in Canada, for a while at least.  Don't get me wrong, I love this country (particularly Toronto) but I can feel it in my bones that the time has come for me to explore new horizons. I honestly feel that this city has nothing else to offer me at this time so the logical thing is for me to move onto more exotic destinations. This may be the chance to see the world that is still foreign to me and after all, who knows, I may end up in The Maldives, may be even Madagascar or what about Thailand, that is sure in for a cultural treat. As of right now it all looks like I am going to be staying within the American continent, however it won't be within the Northern Hemisphere.  I am aiming for the Equatorial line ^.^  Either way, be it for leisure or for business purposes, I will be traveling a bit this year. My best friend has honored me as her Best Maid, which means I HAVE to make an appearance, no excuses, period.  That will take place around the end of July and I am hoping that by then I will be settled down somewhere down south.  This is all very exciting, almost unbelievable.

Aside from moving away,  I have included in my list more interesting things to achieve within a shorter term, such as reading more, writing more, picking up the violin once again (hoping that it works out this time), stop neglecting my languages, committing to my never-ending list of side projects and making it a point to eat less red meat.  WRT to the latter, I don't quite recall the last time I drooled over a steak. On that note, eliminating that from my diet doesn't seem too difficult after all. This goes hand-t0-hand with the fact that I am very  interested in exploring new sources of protein, which include lentils, chickpeas, kidney beans, soy beans and any other type of flavorful bean for that matter. I hope to become a vegetarian one day (no set date yet) as I have previously stated that being a vegetarian in the XXI century simply makes sense, period.  For now I am not completely ready to give up my infamous curry chicken, but I will definitely try to incorporate other things into the recipe and go from there. One thing is for sure: I am not willing to give up sea food in the near future. NO, NO, NO! Specially after being re-introduced to breath-taking-incredibly-delicious rollmops.  Leaving the German delights aside, I still wouldn't have the heart to give up sushi, raw tuna and salmon sashimi, smoked trout among other sea food delicacies.  


From the bottom of my heart, I am hoping that 2011 will turn out to be a great year for self-discovery, self-growth, and self-enhancement. Yes I know, all of that sounds very egocentric and in all honesty I am quite pleased with that, as I feel that I have become my own second plate.  Thus, it is only fair that I start to appreciate meself a bit more and go from there as well. 


I think I have done a decent job summarizing my NY's resolution for MMXI. Now before I go, I will leave you with the song that has traditionally become a Must-Listen on New Year's day:

Best wishes for the year that begins today.-Yours Truly, Dre dnklschwrz, 2011-