Porque te pienso te quiero en la distancia,

sin importar rastro alguno que hayas dejado en mi.

Al saber que como yo sufriras a diario,

"La soledad de dos amantes que al dejarse

estan luchando cada quien por no encontrarse".

Del amor ni se hable: No he dejado de quererte ni un solo dia.

El pensarte me exacerba del dolor.

Puedes jurar que al que quiere lo bendigo.

Y como dice Bunbury, aunque paresca que te lo escribi yo:

" Quiero que seas feliz, Aunque no sea conmigo"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYZiHcevpxM

Te extranno y te vivo a dia a dia.

I made a mistake: "Here I go to fall apart so long

when we'll meet again I will not be there..."
Te acuerdas? Cantando en el estudio, en donde entonabas tus mejores melodias.

"If you come a long this time

I show you the things that were mine

I am bleeding from the walls that cry

oh life has past me by..."

When we meet again I won't be there.

Aun asi sigues lejos,

apartado de mis brazos que calor te brindaron.

De aquel carinno insaciable que te llenaba de vida,

De amor y ternura, reflejados en tu existencia.

Una vez mas, Perdon.

No me canso de clamarte un perdon, de alguna manera irracional

Un perdon inoportuno y cobarde.

El perdon que jamas supe pedir.

Te extranno desde mis entrannas

Mi vida no es la misma sin ti,

aunque no podria ser lo que he alcanzado sino hubiese sido por ti.

El perdon es en nombre de la entrannable fe que hubo en ti.

Aunque me siga mi camino hacia la nada,

esperando un bienestar seguro

no puedo despedirme sin hacer un tributo a vos.

Por haber creido en mi hasta el final

y por seguir haciendolo hasta el sol de hoy.

Gracias.

Te quiero con la fuerza que me da la vida misma.

Al no definir mis sentimientos hacia ti

siento haber perdido lo que me hace falta para recuperar mi humanidad.

Tan intangible; tan irreal

Si pudiera definirte con mis palabras

seria maldecir tu existencia.

Retrasar tu memoria es inalcanzable

En la utopia de mi mente vivo entrecortada por tu ser.

Existiendo en retrospectiva para ser lo que mas deseaste al contemplar un atardecer.

Arrojando piedras en el lago,

liberandote de la rutina misma

mirando hacia el horizonte en busca de un futuro anhelado

a causa de un pasado que siempre te marco.

Contemplando la vaga imagen de tu rostro en mi frente, 

vigilo tu mirada hacia tu futuro.

Atrapo tu pensamiento por un instante,

sin saber el futuro que me espera.

Ese sufrimiento que se alimenta de tu recuerdo.

Suenno con algun dia poder intoxicar ese sufrimiento

para que me abandone de una vez por todas!

Pero aun asi anhelo seguir llevandote en el recuerdo de esos besos

Evocarte en las tardes de febrero, en medio de la nieve.

Recordandote en las noches de junio al  caminar en la madrugada.

El sentarme en el parque a fumar  el humo que alguna vez compartimos.

Tus ojos anhelando un cambio que desafortunadamente no te pude dar..

El coraje que con tanta urgencia buscabas, no te lo logre brindar.

Y robarte una sonrisa al darte una mirada de amor...

Ay, mi muchacho de los ojos tristes -por que no estas aqui?

Para llenarte de alegria tus vacios insaciables.

Espero estes bien, and still my guitar gently weeps. 

PS: As much as I wish I could have finished your song, I failed miserably. I gave it my best shot, but couldn't really synthesize all the feelings I have about you. It's a collage of many different sensations, and yet I am not sure what it is.

I miss you miserably; in the hopes that the grass is greener on the other side.

And even if my human side attempts to knock on material doors,

My heart still remains true to the one and only You.

All is quiet on New Year's Day MMXI

"May the New Year bring you whatever is it that you are contemplating from the bottom of your heart, be it: loosing weight, eating healthier, buying a new car, falling in love, or simply getting by."

-Dre-

I am sure up to start the New Year with my right foot complying to one of the resolutions from my list, which includes actually writing more. I find this quite therapeutic, particularly when I have no reason to rant but yet my head still feels like a HUGE Scrabble bag.  I find this sudden intrinsic drive to spontaneously come up with  resolutions for the NY to be quite amusing. Surprisingly enough, the people around me do not show much interest in doing so. It's funny because I had my mind set on writing mine for quite a while, but for some odd reason I could not get myself to sit down and get it over with, until last night at around 21:00. I came up with 30  bullets of rather realistic goals; nothing too idealistic that I wouldn't be able to achieve. We'll see how all these goals turn out throughout the year.

One thing is certain: 2011 upholds a great deal of important decisions for me to make. If everything goes according to plan I will be finishing my career and joining the work force (finally, the real side of life); something I have been contemplating for a while. Let's face it: Being a student can be quite the bundle of joy but Mensch if you have to stretch yourself in unbelievable manners (physically, emotionally, economically, chronologically, gastronomically, among others). Yes, joining the work force also comes with its disadvantages, such as having to pay taxes (it isn't too bad after all, we get free health care ^.^), having to pay back student loans with HIGH interest fees, various other miscellaneous bills, and let's not forget that if you have a significant other things obviously change, depending on your degree of involvement. For me it isn't too bad right now as my idea of family is not listed in the near future (nor in the far future for that matter), so my entire focus will be on miscellaneous little issues. 

I am aiming that MMXI will be my last year in Canada, for a while at least.  Don't get me wrong, I love this country (particularly Toronto) but I can feel it in my bones that the time has come for me to explore new horizons. I honestly feel that this city has nothing else to offer me at this time so the logical thing is for me to move onto more exotic destinations. This may be the chance to see the world that is still foreign to me and after all, who knows, I may end up in The Maldives, may be even Madagascar or what about Thailand, that is sure in for a cultural treat. As of right now it all looks like I am going to be staying within the American continent, however it won't be within the Northern Hemisphere.  I am aiming for the Equatorial line ^.^  Either way, be it for leisure or for business purposes, I will be traveling a bit this year. My best friend has honored me as her Best Maid, which means I HAVE to make an appearance, no excuses, period.  That will take place around the end of July and I am hoping that by then I will be settled down somewhere down south.  This is all very exciting, almost unbelievable.

Aside from moving away,  I have included in my list more interesting things to achieve within a shorter term, such as reading more, writing more, picking up the violin once again (hoping that it works out this time), stop neglecting my languages, committing to my never-ending list of side projects and making it a point to eat less red meat.  WRT to the latter, I don't quite recall the last time I drooled over a steak. On that note, eliminating that from my diet doesn't seem too difficult after all. This goes hand-t0-hand with the fact that I am very  interested in exploring new sources of protein, which include lentils, chickpeas, kidney beans, soy beans and any other type of flavorful bean for that matter. I hope to become a vegetarian one day (no set date yet) as I have previously stated that being a vegetarian in the XXI century simply makes sense, period.  For now I am not completely ready to give up my infamous curry chicken, but I will definitely try to incorporate other things into the recipe and go from there. One thing is for sure: I am not willing to give up sea food in the near future. NO, NO, NO! Specially after being re-introduced to breath-taking-incredibly-delicious rollmops.  Leaving the German delights aside, I still wouldn't have the heart to give up sushi, raw tuna and salmon sashimi, smoked trout among other sea food delicacies.  


From the bottom of my heart, I am hoping that 2011 will turn out to be a great year for self-discovery, self-growth, and self-enhancement. Yes I know, all of that sounds very egocentric and in all honesty I am quite pleased with that, as I feel that I have become my own second plate.  Thus, it is only fair that I start to appreciate meself a bit more and go from there as well. 


I think I have done a decent job summarizing my NY's resolution for MMXI. Now before I go, I will leave you with the song that has traditionally become a Must-Listen on New Year's day:

Best wishes for the year that begins today.-Yours Truly, Dre dnklschwrz, 2011-

Chistmas Morning - Top 3 Classic Christmas songs

Season's Greetings readers,

From my lovely home in Toronto I wish each and everyone of you a Merry Christmas. I was hoping it would snow this morning but unfortunately that was not the case this year. It is still quite a lovely morning as the field across from my apartment remains quite white from the last time we had some snow. 

The neighborhood is awfully quiet (quite surprising, actually) but it makes for a great first-day off, after having worked for seven days in a row. Sometimes complete calmness is a great way to rest (hence why I'm blogging).

As many of us take the day to rest and recover from the agitated holiday season, let us remember some classic Christmas tunes that have accompanied us throughout time. I want to highlight fond holiday memories through the next few songs:

1. Happy Xmas (War Is Over) - John Lennon

This single was written in 1971 by the one of Rock's greatest legends, Mr. John Lennon, who later joined forces with his loyal companion Yoko Ono and the Plastic Ono Band in an effort to take a stand against the War of Vietnam. The song came to life in the Shaved Fish compilation during the Christmas of '75. 

The lyrics are based on a campaign done by both Lennon and Ono in late 1969 when they rented billboards and posters in eleven cities around the world (New York, Los Angeles, Toronto, Rome, Athens, Amsterdam, Berlin, Paris, London, Tokyo, Hong Kong and Helsinki), which read: "WAR IS OVER! (If You Want It) Happy Christmas from John and Yoko".

At the time of the song's release, the United States was deeply entrenched in the unpopular Vietnam War. The line "War is over, if you want it, war is over, now!" as sung by the background vocals, was taken directly from the billboards.


I personally have a tremendous appreciation for this song as it evokes an enormous feeling of nostalgia, which isn't necessarily bad. Every year I look forward to hearing this song during the Christmas season, since the first time I came across this song in 2003.

2. Jingle Bell Rocks - Bobby Helms


This song is older than my mother, as it came into existence in 1957! How can you NOT love this single? It is probably one of the most "modified" Christmas tunes of all times, as it has been played in rockabilly, country, modern Rock and Roll and who knows what else.


This song has also been featured in various movies, such as  Home Alone 2: Lost in NY, Cookie (1989), and Lethal Weapon among others.


To me this tune kind of makes me want to do the Macarena around the Christmas tree or dance like a little Japanese cartoon. I feel that unless I magically turn into a reindeer and wear green and red, I will never be cool enough to enjoy this song at its maximum.

3. Baby,  It's Cold Outside -  Dianne Reeves and Lou Rawls
Even though this song's first intention was not to refer to a particular time of the year, it is usually associated with the winter and thus with Christmas. There is an interesting story behind this one, which I think you will find amusing.Sometime in 1944 Mr. Frank Henry Loesser had a great idea and wrote this duet to debut it, along with his wife Lynn Garland, at the house warming party of their Navarro Hotel in they city of  New York. It was such a marvelous evening and everyone (hosts included) was so mesmerized by the song to the point that it became their signature tune; even the couple denominated it as "theirs" (well, it was more like Ms. Garland considered it as "theirs").  

Like many men out there, Mr. Loesser was probably thinking of more interesting things (not caring so much about the whole our-song situation) so he sold the rights of the single to MGM. Now, imagine the reaction of Ms. Garland... Not a pretty scene, right?  Anyway, damage done. Who knows how Frank got out of that one. Either way thanks to his aloofness towards his lady's feelings, we get to hear this song throughout the year, particularly during Christmas time.
There are countless versions of this songs interpreted by many of the masters of Jazz, such as Mr. Louis Armstrong, Mrs. Ella Fitzgerald, Mr. Dean Martin, Ms. Dinah Shore, Mr. Buddy Clark, and Ms. Norah Jones, among many others.This time I have chosen the version of Dianne Reeves and Lou Rawls because I find that this one truly evokes a warm feeling associated with the holiday season. I honestly prefer the version interpreted by Louis Armstrong and Velma Middleton, however when I hear it, the first thing that comes to mind it not quite "Tis the season to be jolly, falah lah lah lah lah lah lah lah"  
Merry Christmas to youDre - dnklschwrz, 2010

Merry Christmas to me ^.^

To commemorate this year's holiday season I decided to be selfish enough and get me gifts instead of cherishing my loved ones (or at least that's what I tell myself, to justify my lack of economical fluidity during this gift-giving season). Beside, isn't the world supposed to end in exactly two years from today? No point in being egoistic with one's self... right?   

Inspired on that mentality, I gave myself a pre-Christmas gift today, which was completely unplanned for, but has kept me smiling all night long ^.^

I got meself a copy of Cradle of Filth's Cruelty and the Beast, S.P's Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness (which I think was the equivalent of Muse in 1995) and the latest edition of Decibel, which has a crap-load of interesting bands I had completely forgotten about. Now THAT'S a gift!  

Merry XMAS Dre <3

-Stay Metal-

MM Dre - dnklschwrz, 2010 

Cradle of Filth makes a come back, really?

Definitely exam time is the best time to blog about more interesting things, such as music and new album releases.

Oh boy, where to start!? Oh yes, the almighty Cradle of Filth... ^.^

Personal perspective:

Since the release of Midian (2000) I have been skeptical about their new musical direction. Damnation and a Day (2004) had a few interesting songs but not enough to make a tremendous impact (no point of comparison between their earlier albums, of course). Then, there was Nymphetamine... which is when I really started to question whether or not to give up on their music completely, as they seemed to be focusing on selling albums rather than making real music. The only track I would save from that album would be Nymphetamine (Overdose); the rest are really fillings and a way to justify the release of an album. After that there was HOPE, or at least that's what I thought at first, with the release of Thornography, but once again I was not completely sold on it. I enjoy listening to songs such as Dirge Inferno, The Byronic Man, The Foetus of a New Day kicking and for a while Temptation, but at this point I wonder if my acceptance for those songs has to do with my loyalty to the band vs. whether or not I really like those songs. Regardless, I have kind of gotten used to listen to them.

As I was hoping that some weird ass miracle would take place and they would come to their senses eventually, before releasing a new album, Godspeed on the Devil's Thunder came out when I was least expecting it. I listened to it once, twice, three, four.... and who knows how many times, really, and I could not find it attractive! Aside from the theme behind it (and the whole Gilles de Rais story narrated by the spectacular voice of Doug Bradley), there was NOTHING appealing about it, not even the artwork... To tell you the truth I was hoping for great raw-ass-demented COF but once again they had let me down. Out of loyalty, and aside the fact that I was interviewing Mr. Dani Filth himself on January 20th 2009, I went to the show ready to rock on but to my disappointment (and to illustrate the discontentment of the crowd) I was the only one screaming for an encore (very sad indeed). That night Satyricon stole the show completely and even though my beloved COF (yes, I am still loyal to them) was the main act, at least 40% of the audience was gone before they were done their set. I think you got the picture.

Anyway, back to discography and possible HOPE. I just found out that the band had released their ninth studio album titled Darkly, Darkly, Venus Aversa about a month ago. I have been kind of too busy to keep track of new music, so I got very excited when I found out about it! Before listening to some of the main tracks, I stumbled upon a few interesting reviews where the album seems to be that very-expected comeback. This build up even more expectations and right now I am glad I chose the right track to begin with: Lilith Immaculate Comments: Truly refreshing, indeed! That makes me think that not everything has been lost. I have been listening to the other tracks of the album and they are very decent. I am very VERY content at the moment with my recent discovery, HOWEVER there is one thing that already bothered me (well, actually two things): "Forgive me Father (I have Sinned) and ITS TACKY VIDEO! Yes, we know you guys are doing incredibly but honestly, could you not have come up with something more creative? High Definition does not automatically make it better. I would much rather you used the same quality of The Ghost in the Fog, which looks a lot more macabre and authentic (for lack of a better term).

As usual, I am willing to give Cradle a second chance (or this may actually be the fifth or sixth chance I give them) to get their act together and to stop messing around with ways to make their music more appealing to a general audience. I will be at the Sound Academy on February 26th 2011, hoping to see the COF that made me fall in love with songs such as From Cradle to Enslave, The Forest Whispers my Name, To Eve the art of Witchcraft, A Gothic Romance, Malice Through the Looking Glass, Haunted Shores, Cruelty Brought Three Orchids, Her Ghost in the Fog, Creatures that Kissed the Cold Mirrors among many other great classics. The same Cradle of Filth that made me say WOW to Hollowed be Thy Name, which got me into countless arguments with many Iron Maiden fans about which one is better (I will always think that COF outdid that cover!).

Quoting an old saying: "Amanecera y veremos..."

Dre - dnklschwrz -2010

Tal Ronnen Veganizes Toronto

Celebrity Chef captivates our city with his Conscious way of eating.

If you had asked me five years ago about attending a workshop focused on vegetarianism, I would have thought twice about it before even considering it. Now a days it would be a hard thing to refuse because, in all honesty, after all the talks regarding animal rights, genetically modified food, mad cow disease and even global warming, not being a vegetarian in the XXI century seems a rather inefficient way of living. There are really no excuses and yet we find ourselves falling into one or more of the following categories:

• We need animal protein to function (false)

• Vegetarian meals are boring (false)

• There is no variety within a vegetarian meal, not to mention veganism (false)

• I cannot live without meat because there is nothing that will replace it (false)

I am guilty of being in all of the above, so I had nothing to lose by going to see what Tal Ronnen had to say. I went with an open mind, not knowing what to expect.

Before the event started, they gave each of the members of the audience one of Chef Ronnen’s recipes (courtesy of Chef Douglas McNish, head of Toronto’s Raw Aura organic and raw food restaurant): Celery root soup with Granny Smith Apples and chive oil. That was absolutely DELICIOUS! I found out later on that this is Oprah’s favourite soup and now I can see why. The soup was very rich (without being extravagant) and the apples gave it a nice contrast. The dish was a full experience: appearance, variety of flavours, texture and colour. After this treat, he got my full attention.

Chef Ronnen explained the importance of being a vegetarian in the XXI century and how conscious eating can have a tremendous positive impact, not only on each individual but also on a larger scale. Armed with facts, Chef Ronnen illustrated how a carnivore consumes over four times the resources a vegetarian does and over eight times those the vegans use. By resources, he meant water, animal treatment, maintenance, soil cultivation, processing factories and many other things that go hand to hand with the production of meat. In other words, if we all suddenly became vegetarians, there would be enough resources available to significantly diminish world hunger; not to mention that we would be making a great contribution towards decreasing global warming. In other words, being a vegetarian makes sense! End of the story.

To a carnivore like yours truly, it would be very hard to simply give up meat all of a sudden. This is where everything gets more interesting… There are tasty alternatives that will make the transition VERY smooth! Chef Ronnen himself has been working to promote a product branded under the name of Gardein, which features a complete line of delicious meat-free products made from a variety of alternative protein sources such as organic ancient grain flour (kamut®, amaranth, millet, quinoa). According to Chef Ronnen, the secret success behind this new line is that unlike previous vegetarian lines, which are made out of processed soy and taste like rubber, Gardein’s products take on the flavour of the spices you prepare them with. This product has been featured in shows such as Hell’s Kitchen and Oprah and is now being used in over 30 restaurants in the United States. Gardein’s line is perfect for the conscious eater who doesn’t quite have the heart to give up meat but still wants to give vegetarianism a try.

If you are still sceptical about finding a variety of options within the vegetable world, you should most definitely check out Tal Ronnen’s book The Conscious Cook, which not only will provide you with endless combinations to make every meal an unforgettable experience, but it will also introduce you to the world of Vegetarian and Vegan options which are both tasty and healthy. As Chef Ronnen tries to recreate some of which used to be his favourite dishes as he was growing up (not vegetarian, by the way), he offers new approaches by substituting the meat products for other interesting ingredients making them solely vegetarian, without forgetting the importance of texture and flavour. The Conscious Cook is the first full-colour vegan book to make it into the list of the New York Times’ Best Sellers. Before this book was released, vegetarianism was not taken very seriously. Chef Ronnen has created a cooking revolution, which he hopes will be adopted by the conscious eaters from all corners of the world.

Right after hearing his message, I seriously thought of becoming a vegetarian. Even though I am still pondering about it, who knows, maybe I will join the thousands of people that have given up meat for good, or maybe I am not yet ready to take such a serious step. The only thing I can say for sure is that in the meantime I will be searching for the complete line of Gardein products and try to teach my palate that vegetables can also be fun .

_______________________

Stay tuned to the reviews done by Yours Truly on YummyLocal

Dre - dnklschwrz, 2010

Back?

A little piece of writing that I wrote back in 2006.

Beautiful words from the heart, who knows what was going through my head at the time.

Enjoy

Dre.

And I gave you sun,

So that you could shine endlessly

And without shame.

And I gave you darkness,

So that you could rejoice upon the grief

Within Yourself.

And I gave you solitude,

So that you would appreciate

The warmness of your body.

And I gave you wings,

Not to fly,

But to protect your soft features

From the rain.

Then I gave you space,

So that you could own the world

For a day.

Then I gave you cold,

So that you could enjoy the snow

Melting on your skin.

And after giving you all you've ever wanted,

I gave you freedom,

So that you could choose your destiny,

And then...

You came back to me.

DrE - dnklschwrz / 06